Weakness
by AM Photography
Title
Weakness
Artist
AM Photography
Medium
Photograph - Photography
Description
It took 10 years to be diagnosed and during that time I had countless weakness episodes. Because I have the Relapse Remitting type of MS it would come and go all the time. My right leg was the most affected one and it still is. If I force it too much with walks, standing for too long or exercising too much I feel It hitting me again. I can't run. I can't jump. But I can walk and that's what matters.
Along those years before the diagnosis I remember dragging myself to go to places. One day, struggling to climb the stairs at work, I noticed some people looking at me as if somehow I was making all that up. Many people thought I was creating that or that there was some psychological problem. Many of my family members thought it could be that as well.
This picture expresses exactly how I was feeling during the strongest relapse of all. The one that led me to the doctor who diagnosed and treated me for years until I moved to the US. Previous to my diagnose I took vacation from work, before my vacation ended I got pretty sick. I couldn't really enjoy anything. The whole left side of my body was consumed in numbness and the right side in weakness. Every step required an unimaginable effort. In the beginning of my Ms Journey I was in and out of doctor's appointments, doing all the tests you can imagine, except MRI. Which didn't give me any answer. Only an MRI and Spinal Tap procedure can find signs of MS.
My mother took me everywhere looking for answers when I was at my worst. I couldn't walk by myself. I was at the limit by then, but a thought always crossed my mind - I felt the truth behind all those years was closer to be revealed. It felt frightening and liberating at the same time.
Uploaded
March 15th, 2018
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